Almost There...

Well, I am knocking on the door of Trimester #2! I'm praying that the "magical" 12 week mark will lead to better feeling days, more energy, and less heartburn! But, I'm also realistic in the fact that during my last pregnancy, Trimester #2 brought kidney stones, extreme exhaustion, and lots of weight gain!!! So, I'm holding out hope that this time will be different. Actually, I know this time will be different. I just know it!
I had an ultrasound last Friday and all is well with Baby Phillips #2. We could see arms, legs, and "it" was moving its hands in front of its face. It was so neat to watch. It just makes all of those crummy days worth every bit!
I think the hardest part is "needing" Sadie to grow up faster than I would like her to. I find myself constantly thinking of ways she "needs" to grow up before the new baby arrives. She just seems to be growing up faster every day. I just want time to stand still. I don't want her to grow up. I just "need" her to grow up. Does that make sense? I keep thinking things like: she needs to be rid of her pacifier before August, so that she won't try and steal the baby's pacifier all of the time...or, I need to get her to where I don't have to rock her at all before naps and bedtime, because I don't think I'll have that precious time to rock her while taking care of a newborn...or, she needs to be really good at "playing" by herself, so that when I'm feeding the baby, she can entertain herself, etc. The list goes on and on. These are the types of things I lay awake at night and think of.
Then, the Lord speaks..."Anna, do you not know that I have all of this taken care of? Why are you worrying? Be anxious for NOTHING! This is the plan I have for your life. I will take care of you AND of Sadie AND the new baby! I would never give you more than you can handle. Just trust me.
Then, I'm able to go back to sleep. What would I do without HIM? How do people live a day without HIM? I have no idea...
Anyways, I do find myself getting more and more excited about the new addition. At first, I was a little scared, and still am at times. But, the excitement is now outweighing the fear. It will be so much fun. And, to experience the miracle of birth again just about blows my mind. I replay Sadie's birth in my head a million times a day. That very first second that I saw her face is irreplaceable, and I get to do it all over again with another one! What a blessing. I absolutely cannot wait! I know it will be a long, hot, hot, hot Summer, but it'll be worth the wait.