The End of an Era

Today marked the end of an era in the life of the Phillips Family. Sadie finished Kindergarten and Sawyer finished Pre-K. Sigh...
It was H-A-R-D on my heart. Its funny because I remember just a short 9 months ago, I cried for weeks leading up to Kindergarten. I was so sad to see my baby girl heading off to school. It was so, so hard, and I even admit that I cried for several weeks AFTER she started because I missed her so much! So, needless to say, I have been a little emotional about school all together. Well, never did I think that I would also be crying once school was coming to an end! It has been a wonderful, wonderful year. I cannot say enough good things about Goodpasture as a whole and especially the Little Red School House. Oh, the sweet bubble of the Little Red School House. If I could keep my kids inside of that sweet bubble forever, you better bet I would do it! The teachers have been beyond amazing and the 2 helpers have captured the hearts of my whole family. I spent so much time in that Little Red Schoolhouse over this past year and I have loved every single minute of it. I wouldn't trade it for the world. I have grown VERY close to many of the children in the Kindergarten class and I have gained MANY new friends in a lot of the parents. It's just not what I expected at all! I never thought that I would grow THIS attached to all of these people. But, oh, what a blessing it has been! It has been worth EVERY single sacrifice that we have had to make in order to keep them there. I have said many times that Sadie walked into that place a very shy, reserved little girl, and she is leaving there as a confident young lady.
Anyways, Sadie's graduation was absolutely adorable. These kids did an amazing job and I was so impressed! They were all so cute!!!! They all chose a profession that they want to be when they grow up. Sadie chose to be a cheerleader. Below are several pics from the night. Mostly of her and her buddies and a few from the actual graduation program, etc.

I was so proud of Sadie! She did a great job, said her lines right, and had a blast doing it!
The next day this week, I headed back up to school to celebrate Sawyer's "summer" bday with his class. I thought it was kind of silly to be celebrating his birthday 2 months early, but he felt so special, so it made it all worth it!

We then headed down to Sadie's class to have their end of the year family picnic. It was a special time. Mrs. Lankford handed out all of the Memory Books and said some sweet things to all of us.
This brings us to yesterday...the last FULL day of school. I spent most of the day in tears. Everything was making me cry! It wasn't as much of a sad cry as it was a "I'm not ready for this year to end" cry. I am DEFINITELY ready for Summer! But, I am definitely NOT ready to say goodbye to these kids and parents and teachers. Yes, I am fortunate enough to get to be back at the Little Red School House with Sawyer next year, BUT, I know it will never be the same. This was a very special group of kids and parents!!! I can't really put it into words, but I was just so emotional knowing that it was over. And, this all meant that Sadie would be heading up to the "big" school; no longer in the sweet bubble. :( AND, on top of all of this, my little buddy is starting Kindergarten next year! UGH! Too. Much. Growing. Up. Last night as I was putting Sadie to bed, she always lets me pick a book to read to her. Last night I picked "Guess How Much I Love You". Probably not the smartest choice of book considering the emotional day I had had. But, it was so precious to read those words to her that I have read over and over for the past 6 years of her life.
When I got up this morning, I felt good. Sadie seemed happy to go for her last half day. Sawyer was fired up that Preschool all together was coming to an end and I was feeling excited to start Summer! I went up to school a little early and got Sawyer out. His friends in his class all came over and gave him a BIG group hug and it made him feel so good!!!!
We then walked down to the Little Red School House to get Sadie and say our good bye's. When I opened the door, there were already a roomful of tears! Oh no! Moms were crying, kids were crying, teachers were crying! HELP! We said our sad goodbye's to everyone and headed to the car. Sadie was VERY quiet. I put them in the car and walked over to her side of the car to check on her. I leaned in to hug her and the tears started flowing. Broke. My. Heart!!!!!!! So, of course, what did I do? Yep, I started crying too, which I think kind of made her laugh. LOL I walked back over to Mrs. Lankford to say goodbye to a few others and she cried when I told her that Sadie was upset. It was almost a comical situation that everyone was crying like we were at a funeral! It just goes to show what a special year it has truly been. I will never, ever forget this year!!!!

Mothers Day 2013

Well, I have been absent for quite a while. My life is just busy now. There are no other excuses. The end of the school year is rocking my world! We literally have something on the calendar day and night for the next 2 weeks. In the midst of the madness, Mothers Day rolled around. Its always one of my favorite weekends of the year. Not necessarily because its a day to celebrate me (LOL), but mostly because it usually entails a lot of fun activities!
We started out the weekend by having Muffins with Moms in Sadie's class on Friday morning at school. It was precious! She had made me several sweet things and written some precious words about me. She also made me a heart to wear as a pin and she made me a pillowcase with her handprints on it. I will cherish these things FOREVER! It was a special morning together. I loved every minute. I especially just loved seeing how proud she was of all of her work. She is definitely a hard worker!


Dennis took the kids to the farm on Friday night so that they could spend the whole day there on Saturday. He has done that the past couple of years so that I can go and enjoy a day with my mom and sister without feeling guilty. I love it. He is so precious for doing that for me. It means so much! Before he left, he gave me some money to go shopping with the next day. I cried. I just know that we don't have any extra money right now, especially for me to be shopping with, so it meant even more that he had saved his money to give it to me for Mothers Day.

Me, mom and Rachel all went to Green Hills Mall and had a delicious lunch at the Cheesecake Factory. We shopped ALL DAY LONG! It was WONDERFUL! We laughed a LOT and just had a really good time. It is always one of my favorite days of the year. Last year, we went to Gatlinburg together, which was great, but we are going to Atlanta to Beth Moore in a couple of weeks, so we decided to stay in town this year.
Dennis and the kids came back that night and they had lots of goodies for me! Sawyer was about to jump out of his skin to give me what he had made for me. They made me sit in the chair and close my eyes while they brought their stuff inside from the truck. When they told me to open my eyes, Sawyer accidentally dropped his picture frame that he had made for me. He broke down! It was one of the saddest things I have ever seen in my life! It broke the frame, and it also broke my heart! Dennis had to leave the room because he was so upset. I just hugged Sawyer and told him how much I loved it and I promised him that daddy could fix the frame and make it perfect. Nothing I said made him feel better and I seriously wanted to die!!!!! Anyways, the kids both made me huge cards and they each decorated a picture frame for me that they picked out because Sadie had remembered that I said I needed some new picture frames. So sweet. Thank you Lord for a sweet husband that makes sure his kids know how important it is to make mommy feel special on Mother's Day!!!! Dennis and I couldn't even look at each other or talk about what had just happened with Sawyer without crying for the rest of the night! I was boo-hooing to the kids and just told them it was because I was so happy, but really my heart was broken for my sweet little buddy!
Sunday morning didn't go exactly as planned. Sadie got sick in the middle of the night and she had to sleep with us because she had thrown up all over her whole bed. So, needless to say, I slept horrible all night long because she was kicking me and punching me in the face. It was awesome. I got up and got ready for church, knowing that we couldn't take her and that Dennis would have to stay home with her. So much for our Mother's Day at church that I had looked so forward to. :( I was so excited about getting our picture professionally made at church, among other things, but there was nothing we could do about it. We think it was just something she ate the night before because she seemed fine, but we couldn't take any chances. So, Sawyer and I went on to church and I was so sad! Church was awesome though! Jordan preached an amazing message about the most important gift a mom can give her children is the gift of faith. I loved it.
When Sawyer and I got home, Sadie and Dennis were standing outside waiting on us. Dennis had gotten Sadie's clothes on and gotten her ready so that we could still have our picture made as a family. Dennis knows how important capturing that picture is to me! :)

Afterwards, Sawyer and Dennis headed to Grandma's for lunch with Dennis' family. I was so sad to miss out!!!! But, again, we couldn't take the chance that Sadie could possibly get someone sick, so her and I stayed home and had sandwiches.
My mom came over and kept the kids that night because Dennis had planned us a special dinner at Ruth's Chris. He has done this for me the past 3 years and it is my favorite part of Mother's Day. We get to go and sit down and enjoy a delicious meal after all of the Mother's Day activities. It was so, so wonderful! It never disappoints. Our waiter was awesome and the food was incredible. I was so thankful to my mom for selflessly coming over and spending part of her Mother's Day to babysit my kids. It meant the world to me and I was able to go and enjoy my dinner even more, knowing that she was at our house with them, instead of with a babysitter. Although, Sadie tried to pull the "my belly still hurts" card, and when we got home, she was asleep in NaNa's arms, instead of in the bed where she was supposed to be. I think she knew what she was doing. LOL It's probably been years since my mom has rocked one of my children to sleep.
All in all, I seriously had the best Mothers Day ever. I am beyond blessed to have a husband that goes above and beyond to make me feel extra special. I love him more than anything! And, I am beyond blessed to have such a special relationship with my own mom. It just keeps getting better and I am one lucky girl!!!!

Sadie's 6th Birthday

My little girl just doesn't seem so "little" anymore. She is now officially 6 years old. 6 years old is big. Turning 6 has made this momma sad!
Friday, I took cupcakes up to her school to celebrate her and Mac's birthdays. They were born on the very same day in the same hospital. How neat!

Mrs. Mandy made, per Sadie's request, Goodpasture Cougar chocolate cupcakes. All of the kids were so excited to see the paw print on their cupcakes!
Saturday morning, she slept VERY late, which is unusual for her these days. She got up and we let her open her presents. She loved them!

God gave Sadie a BEAUTIFUL day for her birthday this year!!! And, boy, did we need it! We have all been CRAVING some sunshine and warm weather, but God specifically saved it for March 9th. At least I like to think so...
We played outside all day long and got ready to have our best friends over for Sadie's birthday. We had the BEST night with our friends!

We had the perfect night and Sadie had the time of her life with her closest friends! We opted out of doing a big party this year. We end up spending SO much money every year!! So, we just kept it small and simple this year. We are going to American Girl in 2 weeks for Alba's birthday, so we knew we needed to save up $ for that!
Tomorrow night, we are having some of her classmates to Sweet CeCe's to enjoy some ice cream with them! Looking very forward to it!

Sadie has grown into a precious young lady this year. Starting Kindergarten has changed her from the inside out. She is reading amazingly well! Her writing is almost perfect! She has yet to get in trouble all year long, and she will be the first to tell you how proud of herself she is for that! :) She loves playing on her I-Pad, doing ALL things artsy, swinging outside, and her most favorite is going to school. She loves all of her friends and she is a friend to everyone. I couldn't be more proud of the sweet girl that she has become and continues to be. Happy 6th to my precious angel pie!

Ringin' in the New Year

3 days after Christmas, we packed up and headed to mom's cabin in Gatlinburg to spend some time away. As you can see from a few posts ago, since we missed out on our annual Hilton Head trip this year, we have all yearned for a getaway together! Like, seriously...I have been physically craving a trip with my family. We knew we couldn't spend a lot, so I asked mom back in November if we could have her cabin for New Years and thankfully, she said yes!
I'm not sure I can even put into words what this trip has done for me. Not only has it brought our little family closer than ever, but it has healed my heart and my soul that have been broken for months. I can barely type this without bursting into tears, but I have been broken for the past 6 months or so. Physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Just broken. Shattered. My spirit has not only been broken, but stomped on and demolished. I have endured the hardest 6 months of my life and I have been begging God for a break. I needed something to feel renewed. I thought that Christmas did it for me, but I still felt myself fighting "that feeling" for those few days after Christmas.
Now, after 5 FULL days with just my foursome, I feel better than I have felt in months. I am not fighting any feelings away. I feel like me again. I have the drive and desire and the want to improve and make myself better this year. The dread is gone. The sadness is gone. It is like God poured Himself out over me for the past 5 days and showed me what life it all about. I have been more content than I have felt in months. Just spending time with my family has done me better than good. Just when I think that God has forgotten about me again, He unknowingly leads us up a mountain (literally), through a blizzard (literally). and places us on a mountaintop to see the most magnificent sunset I have ever seen. God knows me. He knows I am insanely obsessed with sunsets. So, what did He do? He gave me what my heart yearned for. And, He let me experience it with the 3 people that I love more than life! He let us see and experience the wonders of His beauty in more ways than I thought could happen over the course of 5 days.
I was blessed to say goodbye to 2012 (Praise the Lord) and hello to 2013 with my sweet family by going on a beautiful hike, seeing about 100 deer, driving, talking, eating at our favorite place, and chillin' in the hottub. What more could a girl ask for?
Literally, as the countdown was happening for the ball to drop, I was praying to myself. I was asking God to please, please, please show me what He wants from me in 2013. I am not going to be shallow this year and begin my year only concerned with losing a few pounds as a resolution. I want my resolution this year to be so much more than that. I want to fully and completely seek what God wants from me. He knows how much I hate change, yet He has allowed so many changes in my life over these past few months. So, instead of fighting the changes and being afraid and battling extreme anxiety, I am going to resolve to just trust Him. I saw someone on Twitter say that God has our 2013 already planned and He desires to see us dancing joyfully throughout the whole year, no matter what our plans. So, I want to dance. And, I want to dance with joy.
Thank you mom for letting us have your cabin for this week. You will probably never know what sacrifice you really made by allowing us to take up this week. And, thank you God for letting me begin 2013 with the people I cherish the most. Thank you for bringing me out of darkness into the light and for giving me time to just relax and reflect. Forgive me for not seeing how blessed I am.
So, my word for 2013 is "HOPE". I am hopeful that this year will be better than last. I am hopeful that those around me who are hurting will be healed. I am hopeful that the next change that comes my way will be embraced by me, instead of fought against. I am hopeful that my marriage will only get better. I am hopeful that I will intentionally invest in my children lives. I am hopeful that I will make a difference in someone's life. And, lastly, I am hopeful that I will be a better wife, mother, daughter, sister and friend to all of those around me. I am no longer waiting FOR hope. I am waiting WITH hope.