Precious Little Elijah

I don't usually post things like this, but I want so badly for as many people to pray for this precious little boy as possible. Dawn is one of my dearest friends whom I don't get to talk with much anymore due to the busyness of our lives, kids, distance, etc. But, I still love her more than anything! I received this email from her today and I just really want everyone that reads this to send up a prayer for sweet Elijah. Here is what it says:

"Family & Friends,

I am hopeful this email finds you all in good health and spirits. Randall and I are doing well, healthy, and excited about the upcoming arrival of Elijah's little brother (I'm due on Valentines Day!). Elijah is now in the 60th percentile on the regular weight/height charts and will discontinue physical & occupational therapy around his second birthday-which means he is developmentally right on track!

I am writing to request that you pray for our little boys health. By the grace of God, a routine physical revealed a large mass on his liver. An ultrasound, CT Scan and blood work concluded that this softball sized mass is a hepatoblastoma, a form of liver cancer. The mass is too large to be removed so Elijah will undergo a biopsy to confirm the type and stage - then chemotherapy until the tumor is small enough to be removed.

Randall and I are asking our family and friends to pray that Elijah responds well to all that he is about to take on. He has already fought so hard to be with us with entering this world 14 weeks early, spending 2 1/2 months in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, struggling with bronchopulmonary dysplasia, and undergoing 4 surgeries all before he was able to walk. He has a difficult 4 month journey ahead of him so please lift him up and pray that the strength, joy and beautiful spirit we see in him everyday continues to carry him through."

Below is a picture of him and Sadie when they were just babies. I always loved this picture because it looks like Sadie is saying "get off me, boy!"!!!

Thank you for your prayers. God hears every single one and loves little Elijah more than anyone else.

My Precious little "Pumpkin"

Grammy bought Sawyer a sweet little jack-o-lantern outfit to wear during this Halloween season. He looked so cute in it today and I had to take his picture. He's started smiling a lot more lately, and I was singing to him today and he was loving it! Of course, once I went and got my camera, he seemed less excited, but I still wanted to capture his sweet little face on video. Please, please, please excuse my singing!!!! He's just so precious! I love hearing his little breath in my ear when I'm holding him. I think that has to be the sweetest sound in the world!!!

We all went to my Memaw's today so that Sadie could play in her "toy closet" up in their bonus room. There are so many toys in there that Sadie doesn't know what to do with herself. It's hilarious. There are even toys and books in there that I used to play with when I was a little girl. It brings back so many memories. I love it!!! I caught a quick picture of Sadie and Memaw right before we left and right before I fell on their stairs carrying both of my children, but that's a whole other story...

Mommy Guilt

Am I the only mother out there who just feels bogged down by my daily dose of guilt? I call it "mommy guilt".
I feel guilty because I can't spend enough time with Sadie, or I'm not holding Sawyer as much as I held Sadie when she was a baby. Or, I'm letting Sadie watch WAY too much TV, b/c I'm busy with Sawyer. Or, I'm not being the wife I need to be to Dennis because I'm tied down with the kids. Or, the house isn't clean enough because I've got more important things to do. HELP!
Please tell me I'm not the only one!!! I know that guilt is straight from Satan and I despise it! How can I make it better? How can I let it go?
I don't want to feel guilty all of the time. I want to enjoy my day as it goes on, but I struggle so much with feeling guilty because I only have 2 hands!
I feel guilty right now for being on the computer when I know I should be playing dolls with Sadie. (although she seems perfectly content playing with my exercise band right now)...which leads me to another feeling of guilt - I feel guilty for not working out!!! AAAAAGGGGHHHHHH!!
Okay, laugh with me out there and let me know I'm not alone.
Much love!

Life has Changed!

This weekend was quite boring! We did pretty much nothing. Dennis went hunting on Saturday morning, so I'm sure that was the highlight of his weekend, but the rest of the weekend, we didn't do anything, which was fine.
My life has definitely begun to change these past few weeks. Sawyer has definitely woken up! His first 2 months home definitely fooled me! I thought he was just going to sleep all of the time. Sadie never slept, so I never experienced what that was like until we had Sawyer. The past 2 months, he has slept and been so extremely easy for the most part. I keep telling everyone that he has definitely woken up now! He's harder to get to sleep, he stays awake much longer during the day, and he cries a lot more. I know, it's all typical baby stuff. It's just a lot harder with 2! The first 2 months, he could sleep through Sadie's squeals, laughs, toy banging, etc. Now, when he's asleep downstairs during the day, every sound she makes causes him to jump and usually wake up. Bummer!!! And, I can't expect her to be quiet all of the time. I mean, she's 18 months for crying out loud. Running around and playing are her specialties! But, I just have to learn how to juggle all of this. I've definitely had a few rough days the past 2 weeks. Sawyer has become a little more high maintenance and for the most part, won't let me put him down much. In the meantime, I'm still trying to cook, take care of Sadie, be able to use the bathroom every now and then, and try to keep this house looking halfway decent on the inside. Wow! Motherhood is hard!!!! But, it's still the most rewarding job in the world and I wouldn't trade it for any other job in the world. I know that Sawyer's "high maintenance" phase will only last a short while. I just have to take it "phase by phase" and realize that it will be over soon, and I'll have a whole new set of challenges to deal with. He still sleeps GREAT at night too, so I try to keep it all in perspective. I would much rather him scream a bit during the day than to scream all night long. He still has yet to keep me up at night screaming. He just wakes up to eat every few hours and goes right back to sleep. Let's hope that phase lasts FOREVER!!